I have been
waiting for the initial shock to dull into numbness before weighing in on
Philip Seymour Hoffman's 'suicide.' I say suicide because Philip knew what he
was doing and where it would inevitably lead, should he 'pick up and use.'
(Those are terms that every addict and alcoholic understands. I know because I
have been working a program of recovery for 27 years, this month. )
I can say,
"Philip knew!" because that's where we met more than two decades ago.
His name was only, 'Philip' back then. He had not added the other appellation,
yet. Then again, my name was only 'David!' I've since added my middle name, as
well. I've added a lot of things to my life, since then. I've subtracted even
more. But, those things that I gave up were unnecessary, some quite damaging.
What I kept has made life much simpler, much kinder and more joyful. I
guess Phil, for all of his brilliance, couldn't get that. It happens.
When I met him he
was a serious, introspective and very frightened young actor. I think it was at
a musicians meeting in Venice
Beach Beverly Hills
At that time, I
had about 5 years. He was a ' newcomer' and was scared shitless. He would
probably have been served better if he held on to some of that reverential
fear. I could have saved his life. It has saved mine, many times. I guess he
figured he could handle it, now. After all, he was a 'Star,' now. Not just some
'wannabe' with a budding substance issue. He obviously didn't take this
cunning, baffling disease seriously enough. This 'Jones' is the one
neighbor you definitely don't want moving into your 'Hood!' Especially now!
That shit he jacked must have been too hot!
The 'good goods'
our boys and girls in 'red, white and blues' are muling back in their 'ditty
bags' from 'The Big A' (I'm talking Afghanistan here, not Manhattan!), makes
the 'Blue Cheer' that Frank Lucas was 'body bagging' back from 'Nam, when I
lived up on 138th and Lenox, look like your mamma's laundry detergent! If
you think these kids are doing '5 bits in the zone' because they love kicking
Taliban ass or thumping Al Queda butt, you got another thing coming!
Contrary to what
the jive ass turkeys in Washington are laying
down, this 'horse' ain't riding up from ole Mexico Pearl Moscow
(FACT: I was
living in Sweden Scandinavia .
They were buying kilos of 100% pure heroine on the back streets of Kiev [then a
Soviet province] for less than it cost to buy a liter bottle of Schnapps
{Akavit} in Stockholm! )
You think I'm
crazy?! Try this on for size. They are armed and highly trained agents of
destruction, compliments of Uncle Sam. But, their benevolent 'uncle' has turned
his back (courtesy of a conservative Congress.) There are no jobs for most of
them when they do come back. The streets are filled with punks who don't know a
'K-zone' from an 'e-zine,' but they're already hooked on 'Mother's little
helpers' like 'Oxy' and 'Ex!'
In our
under-regulated, 'free market economy' where 'bling is the thing' and it
doesn't matter how and where you got it, the market is there, the buyers are
hungry for 'cheap meds' and the suppliers are ready and more than willing to
let our own bad habits and disgruntled ex-military pull us down from the
inside. IF YOU DON'T THINK IT CAN HAPPEN HERE, YOU BEST PULL YOUR HEAD OUT OF
YOUR TOO FAT ASS!
Finally, I have
one question for our military brass, WHO'S WATCHING THE TROOPS, WHILE YOU'RE
WATCHING YOURSELVES ON THE NEWS?! And America
My advice is:
Stop doing 'the Devil's dance!' STOP PERFORMING MEANINGLESS 'WITCH-HUNTS' ON
HARMLESS BALLPLAYERS! (After all, how can they possibly hurt us? Are they going
to kill somebody's stupid record for home runs? Touchdowns? Points in a single
game, maybe?) LET'S START CHECKING VETS 'ROLLOUT KITS.' (These people are
trained to kill and destroy !) LET 'S JUST SEE WHO'S HOLDING WHAT AND WHAT KIND
OF KOOL-AID THEY'VE BEEN DRINKING, BECAUSE THAT CRAP THAT 'BIG PHARMA' SOLD
AMERICA WHILE THEY WERE STILL CHILDREN ISN'T WORTH THE PISS IT TAKES TO TEST
FOR IT NOW, BY COMPARISON! WAKE UP, AMERICA
Finally, and most
importantly, God Bless America
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